Selling Out

One of the most difficult things to toss up in the brain is the issue of selling out. As a Christian artist this means so many things. We are to do all things for the glory of God, and so with our work we market ourselves to get the audition to get the part to the rehearsal to the performances, all of it is done for the glory. For me, the moment it becomes about something other than that it can easily become worshipping another god. I mean the grind you have to be on in order to get work and stay working. The hours of reading and research, not to mention the physical parameters you plan to meet to keep your instrument healthy and active and prepared. The sheer concentration of all these energies in one directing, acting, is almost like worship. We MUST have convictions. We MUST have standards or else we sell out on the ultimate creditor, our Father.
We are a ship that has a mighty anchor on it and it keeps us grounded when the winds come. The business for a Christian artist can be a stormy sea. If we are not grounded in some standard the winds of entertainment and doing it for you, and other persuasions will toss you to and fro and yes, yes, soon you will have to survive the way the other ships do, addictions. You will be filled with this need, empty and void, that must be filled everyday. If this need is not filled your lack of standard will cause suicidal thoughts to creep in and sooner or later it may be you who dies of the overdose of some drug. It is just so important to have something you stand for or you will fall for everything. Selling out is at the core placing yourself on an auction block and going forward into the slavery of others. Stand tall, head up, shoulders back and declare that you are a son of God not a beast of burden; no one will be able to ride me!!!!

RISK

If you are not willing to risk you are not willing to love, and if you are not willing to love how can you ever find the purpose of your life? We live in a world of billions of people, and through the media we are all neighbors, or family in one way or another. There is no way to escape it, if you are looking for your purpose in this life, with this sort of context IT INVOLVES PEOPLE. Having been alive on earth we all notice, recognize, accept that PEOPLE can and will let us down. WOW!! Now how do you deal with that? Your purpose is irrevocably tied to people and yet the very object of your purpose is the very thing, though potential, that can let you down. Life is about RISK. The choice to live in itself is a RISK. Love is a RISK. There is no escape from the RISK, but if your fear outweighs the needs of the people then maybe you are right, sit down and shut up and let someone else do it. But if you have looked into the deepest parts of yourself and found that your purpose in this life is worth the risk, that your fear can never compare to the starving and the naked, the unfortunate and the oppressed, then be ready to risk it... yes your life. I am a firm believer if you are living this life and you can not find something to die for, if need be, you are disconnected from the world you live. You are an alien, and are in my prayers that we all find this connection, this hook up to the true purpose of our lives, each other.
You have to be willing to risk in order to step into your destiny, your purpose, and until you do, until I do, we will never live. We will be the comfortable ones in movie and in reality tv shows who breathe in the safe haven of fiction, untouched by the grim of the real world. Offer your body as a sacrifice for the service of others. Offer your time for the up-lift-ment of others. This is what it means to live. To love God with everything we have to love Him and to love our neighbor as ourself, and that this love is what migrates us all from the barbaric nature of being humans to another level, no title for it, just another level... where war does not exist, where true peace walks freely, where false humility is on death row and we all live for the other, a love unconditional, without the fear of RISK...

Counterfeit vs Real Thing

Don't settle for the counterfeit, wait for the real thing, we rush so quickly into choosing, picking what gratifies for the moment and agonize forever; don't settle for the copy, the cut and pasted version, wait, patiently, faithfully on the real thing... there will be no regrets.

Definition of Success

My Actor's Manifesto by: WArRiOR

I have redefined success. I guess the industry has redefined success. For them winning the approval of a secret group of board members, who somehow have chosen themselves to judge what is really good work and what is excellent work, the trophy is the end for them. Well, maybe winning more trophies, or gaining more contacts in their email and cell phones that will be an arsenal of stepping stones to achieve, their means to their end. Man, me too though!! I wanted that same thing... the lights, the camera, a piece of me now still imagines answering questions to reporters, "So, Johnnie how does it feel to be here at the Tony's?"

Some how my heart is breaking. My love for the things I use to love is fading. Somehow my feet are touching the ground of a new atmosphere. The definition of success is morphing for me.
Success in the dictionary is defined: noun
1. the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors.
2. the attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like.
3. a successful performance or achievement: The play was an instant success.
4. a person or thing that is successful: She was a great success on the talk show.
5. Obsolete. outcome.

In this product-oriented way the word success and being successful is all about reaching for something out there, and yes indeed some of the work involves this, indeed. But it is the work that involves this... the product is always in process because it is constantly, if fortunate, will be viewed by many people from various backgrounds who will continue to shape it in their own minds as to what it means to them... isn't that something, our final project is always being processed for someone witnessing it. It is never about the product, just the process. It is in the process where we find out who we are and what we are truly capable of. It is in the suffering process of the birthing the child does the mother find the reason to laugh and cling to the child afterward. It is truly in the process of not knowing does the next moment of certainty really clears the mind. The process is where the gold is mined. The process is where, if we can learn to live there, we find the multi-facets of our instrument, the transient beauty of our virtue, the darkness of our vices; it is here where we are most human, most responsive, most connected to the other lives around us because we are DEPENDENT on the unknown. For some reason it is the unknown that draws us humans to the deeper parts of ourselves... for some reason it repels us too. We are afraid of this not-knowing, because it, for me, is the ultimate process of finding the greatest moment of certainty, the reality of God.

As an actor I love my choices. I love my instrument. I will find satisfaction in the now space, not the tomorrow space. I hunger and I thirst for now. I am starving for living in this moment and living it as perfectly as a moment can be lived and moving to the next.